reflections on coming and going

Lawrance and I recently took a young couple to Meinong for a last outing before they left to go back to Canada.  They were here for a year, and now they have returned to North America to pursue seminary and to follow the Lord where He will lead them next.

Later today, I'm meeting with young lady from the UK whose been here for three years for our last heart-to-heart before she leaves Taiwan to prepare for what God has in store for her next.

Meanwhile, we've also recently had other new young couples and single ladies arrive in the last few months, each planning on coming and serving for about a year.

Seeing these guys and gals come and go causes me to reflect, and it stirs up mixed emotions.  So, here are some of the things I'm thinking and feeling these days.

One, I'm old.  Let's just be blunt about it.  I used to be the 19 or 20 year old adventuring in Taiwan and trying to make sense of this foreign place, struggling with the language and trying exotic foods.  The place is longer foreign, language no longer quite the struggle, and the foods no longer exotic.  (This photo of me in the Hakka outfit was taken in 1997 at the exact same place as the above photo of Lawrance and our friend.)

I'm no longer the newcomer.  There will always be missionaries who've lived her longer than I have, so I still feel like I'm new here.  But, I guess after nine years, I'm not really that new, huh?  Which then makes me question why haven't I learned MORE Chinese?  Why haven't I shared the gospel MORE?  Why haven't I paid off MORE of my school loans?  Why haven't I [fill in the blank] MORE?

I'm not sure I could leave Taiwan and not know if I'd ever be back. Ok, so part of this tie to Taiwan is obviously the fact that I now have family here and this is my husband's homeland, but it is more than that.  I've spent my entire adult life living and working in Taiwan.  Quite frankly, I don't know how to be a "grown up" in America.  I would be willing to live in America for a few years to either pursue further education or allow Lawrance to pursue further education (and give our possible future children the chance to be close to family), but I'm not sure I'd be able to pack my bags and say farewell ilha formosa.  Of course, if my Lord asked me to, I would, but it would be emotional.

I love Taiwan.  I love living here, teaching here, serving here.  But, I am reminded that, even here, I sojourn.

This world is not my home.   No matter where I reside physically, may the Father graciously allow and enable me to "proclaim the excellencies of Him who called me out of darkness into His marvelous light" because there was a time when I had "had not received mercy, but now I have received mercy" (1 Peter 2).

love unreserved

Lawrance is leading worship this Sunday at the bilingual church we are a part of, and below is one of the songs he’s using.  I think it is such a pretty song.

In fact, I first heard it when our friends sang it at our wedding.  There is another version with the lyrics changed to make a wedding version of the song.



Since the song originates from Hong Kong, I can only find it online in Cantonese and English.  (Well, I did find it here, but I think the Cantonese version is prettier.)









Lyrics in Chinese:

常聽說 世界愛沒長久，
哪裡會有愛無盡頭？
塵俗的愛只在乎曾擁有，
一刻燦爛便要走！
而我卻 確信愛是恆久，
碰到了你已無別求：
無從解釋、不可說明的愛，
千秋過後仍長存不朽！
誰人受 痛苦被懸掛在木頭？
至高的愛盡見於刺穿的手；
看！血在流反映愛沒保留，
持續不死的愛到萬世不休！
惟求奉上生命全歸主所有，
要將一切盡獻於我主的手；
我已決定今生再沒所求，
惟望得主稱讚已足夠！

Lyrics of the English version (not a direct translation, so it’s more “singable):

I’ve always been told love won’t survive
Promises will turn into lies
The world just thinks love comes and passes though
It never lasts pure and true
But I still believe can last
It’s your unfailing love that gives me rest
You were there when I needed you most
I’ll never walk all alone
On the cross you died and took away my curse
Love so wondrous no one ever could deserve
Your bleeding hands proved your love unreserved
You’re my greatest joy and treasure on the earth.
Make my life a fragrant offering I pray
Help me Lord to serve you truly every day
Through tears and joy I’ll give you all my praise
Let the whole world know your love and grace

two years ago

Two years ago  . . . on January 15, 2008  . . . a very dear friend of ours, had lunch with Lawrance and asked him to consider asking me out.  That night he did.

We know that our Loving Heavenly Father is the ultimate matchmaker, but we are BOTH so very grateful to our friend Corrina helping (ok, begging) Lawrance to consider Amanda as a potential partner.

You see, Corrina was special.  Unlike many other people I’d share my longings to be married with, Corrina wouldn’t promise me that “one day I’d find someone.”  She never spouted out trite phrases in an effort to comfort me and then change the topic.  Nor did she, as some actually did, tell me that I was better off single because I had more freedom and could do as I pleased.

Instead, Corrina would look at me and say, “I want you to be married too.  Marriage is so good.  You’d love it so much.”

She delighted in her own marriage and felt free to share that delight with me a hurting single.  It wasn’t bragging.  It didn’t hurt me more.  In fact, it was truly comforting because she was longing for me right along side me.  Empathizing.

After one night of some deep empathy and tears, I openly asked Corrina for help.  “If you know anyone who you think might make a good husband for me, please introduce us.”

Her reply that night (Jan. 14, 2008) was “Amanda, I think you need to go to a bigger church.  Go out, meet more people.”  But that night after I left, her heart was heavy as she prayed to God for me asking for wisdom in how to help her friend.

The next day . . . totally unplanned, she bumped into and then had lunch with Lawrance, and half way through, she suddenly thought “ah ha, it’s you!”

The rest is history.  Blissful, beautiful history. :)

Us with Corrina, our matchmaker, after our Taiwanese ceremony

men worshiping

We typically sent in the front, so when we sat in the back (yes, there are only five pews and three rows) I noticed something unusual for Taiwan--lots of men.  More men than women in fact on this particular Sunday. 

Lord, bring more Taiwanese MEN unto Yourself!!!  Raise them up as leaders of their families and of this nation.  Lord, please let what was true for the jailer Acts 16:33-34 be true for men throughout Taiwan "he was baptized at once, he and all his family.  . . . And he rejoiced along with his entire household that he had believed in God."

guojong & meishiang's banquet

The wedding banquet started around 12:30 following the wedding ceremony at the church.

First, we signed the guest book and gave the people at the table our wedding gift (a red envelope with cash inside).  They immediately record the names on the red envelope and the amount of the gift.  In modern Taiwanese culture, the majority of the money given at the wedding goes towards paying for the banquet.

And the banquet room was really festive with balloons everywhere!

After the guests had found their tables and sat down, the bridal party and bride and groom entered the banquet hall.  The flower children came in after the groomsman and maid of honor, the only thing that indicates that they are there is that someone had tied helium balloons to their wrists.  (The man speaking the Chinese . . . that's my hubby, he was the MC of the banquet.)

Thanking all the guests for coming by toasting from the font stage.

Since I didn't get many photos of the food from our banquet, I made sure to get a photo of EVERY SINGLE dish taken at their wedding as well as some of the drinks.

There were around 25 tables.

Here's the view of our table.

After a few dishes . . .bride and groom enter again, this time with the bride in a new dress.

Games and tricks on brides and grooms is a HUGE part of most wedding banquets.  This very private couple didn't want to be embarrassed.  So, Lawrance and I came up with a game for the new couple to play.  He asked them questions such as "who fell in love first" and "who will hold the remote control to the TV."  Then they decided who and held up a photo of the one they thought was the answer.

Their "punishment" for not agreeing with each other was for MeiShiang to find (with her hands only, eyes closed) some black file clips that Lawrance had hid on GouJong--one for every question "wrong."

They also had the really sweet idea to "reward" their guests with a "lucky draw."  They asked their guests to leave words of blessings on little cards and then drew out 30 of the blessings to read aloud during the banquet.  Those whose blessings were read aloud were given homemade mango pudding as a reward.

They then went table to table toasting their guests ten at a time.

After the toasting, they disappeared for awhile and came back with the bride in dress number three and ready to give away the bride's bouquet.

They had a really unique way of giving away the bouquet.  They called all their single friends--male and female--up to the front by name. Then handed each one a red string.  One of the red strings was attached to the bouquet. The one with the lucky attached string got to keep the bouquet.  The rest went home with consolatory chopsticks.

 
After the banquet, they stood at the door and "song ke."  They passed out roses (the first time I'd seen that) and candy as they said goodbye and thanks for coming to their guests.  And of course took time to take photos with their guests too. :)

The happy bride waves "bye!!" :D

guojong and meishiang's wedding

This past weekend, Lawrance and I had the privilege to attend our first Taiwanese couple wedding as a married couple. (We attended a wedding in Taiwan earlier this year . . . but both the bride and groom were American.) 

It was a sheer joy to watch these two friends--both believers--commit
to living life together forever.

The elder who helped them with their
vows so totally STRESSED that this was a forever thing. He even made
them take 10 seconds to reconsider their desire to marry and gave them a chance to back out
guilt free if they wanted to.

Because the churches here are small and because the wedding party is usually just one best man and one bridesmaid (in white too), usually the groom comes down the center aisle before the bride.  So . . . here comes the groom . . .

and the bride too . . .

Lawrance was able to get the cute flower girl to smile for the camera.

They repeated their vows together at the same time both facing forward. I'm glad they got to say vows at all though . . . because many times Taiwanese weddings have no spoken vows.


He rolled her veil (a Taiwanese tradition) SO SLOWLY . . . it was obvious he was cherishing each moment.
SO SWEET!!!


The elder who led them in their vows, also had the privilege of stamping their (unofficial) marriage certificate.

They honored their parents by giving them bouquets of flowers near the end of the ceremony.

Then both sets of parents stood up, faced the wedding guests, and bowed in order to show their appreciation for the guests' attendance.

What followed next were several group photos with the bride and groom front and center. :)

And, finally, after much coaxing (from me and my hubby), we finally were allowed to get a photo of just the bride and groom.

And, then, after some major begging, we were able to get a photo of the newlyweds kissing--well . . . at least of him kissing her on the cheek.

Before we all headed off for the banquet, Lawrance and I were able to get a photo alone with our friends on their wedding day.

ten years ago, I wrote my first "blog"

Ok, so actually it was written on what is called a website . . . but still I was trying to make it like a blog before blogging platforms were abundantly everywhere. 

Ten years ago, in a school's computer room somewhere in northern Taiwan, I became a blogger, and I didn't even know it!

To get my printed photos online, I began using using a scanner in Chinese and yahoo's geocities to record my daily life here in Taiwan.  The photo quality is terrible . . . and the layout was tedious, but, if I do say so myself, the design was better than many "homemade" websites from the late '90s. 

But OH!  if I had had flickr and blogger back then, not to mention a digital camera  . . . how sweet that would have been!!!! 

In fact, I carried my mom's 35mm film camera in my purse daily for a year.  Soon after that I got my first digital camera, and so for nearly 10 years now my purse has always housed a point and shoot camera.  It is essential--more important than lipgloss and a driver's licence!

Anyway, Geocities is closing later this year, which made me want to take a walk down memory lane.  Feel free to click through and see what life was like for me as an exchange student in Taiwan in 1999. 

Here was my very first "blog." (nothing is there now besides the "first blog," which I didn't even know was a blog at the time.)

I had an index/home page (which originally was set up kinda of like flickr's sets page), that I changed when I started using another site and then changed again when I moved to blogging.

Here are the "1st pages of each group of photos":

flying cows in taiwan
summer in taiwan
studying in taiwan
residing in taiwan
friends in taiwan
sightseeing in taiwan
holidays in taiwan
classmates in taiwan
religion in taiwan
vacation in japan

Based on these "album" names, can you guess what I called that very first site? 

That's right "amanda in taiwan."  And, yes, my love for not using capital letters in my online world titles started with this very site . . . ten years ago!! (Can you tell I'm having a hard time accepting it was a decade ago that all this happened!?!?!)

Bye-bye, my dear first online home.  Rest in peace.

we all need friends

In life, we need friends.  But, we need different kinds of friends. 
From Paul's life, we can see some of the different kinds of friendships
we need.  I think we need in life:

1. a Barnabas,


2. a Paul,


3. a Timothy,*


4. and other companions too.

Paul and Barnabas were close friends.  Barnabas helped Paul get started in the ministry (Acts 11:19-26).  After that, their names are mentioned together as a pair twenty times
in just a few chapters of Acts: Paul and Barnabas, Barnabas and Paul. 
These two spent quite a bit of time together preaching the Good News;
they were co-workers in ministry.  Paul and Barnabas also had the
freedom to "disagree strongly" with each other (Acts 15:36-40). 
We all need friends who we can accomplish like-mind goals with, people
who will be there with us and have the same vision and heartbeat that
we do, but who are not afraid to challange us and hold us accountable
to truth.

In addition to needing friends to walk along side us, we need friends who can mentor us and friends who we can mentor.  In 1 Timothy 2:1,
Paul calls Timothy his "true child in the faith."  It is obvious in his
letters to Timothy that Paul is teaching and guiding Timothy, taking
him under his proverbial wing.  I have always treasured the "Pauls" in
my life, older women who have walked the path before me who can help me
to follow it.  Likewise, I am able to help others who are just now walking along parts of the path I've already tread.  It is important that we have mentors in our
life and that we mentor others as well. 

I often tend to picture Paul "out there" on his own trailblazing and
spreading the gospel alone.  But that is not an accurate picture.  Paul
had other companions, male--Titus, Silas, Luke, Mark, Apollos,
Epaphroditus, Aquila--and female--Pricillia, Phoebe, Lydia, Euodia, and
Syntyche--just to name a few of his brothers and sisters in the Lord. 
In Paul's letters to the various churches, he mentions some by name
sending greetings or thanking them for help sent.  Paul clearly had many
friends who he lived in close communion with and considered beloved.

Like Paul, we too need others.  We need to be supported and helped.  We need companionship and fellowship.  Friendships and friends in all shapes and
sizes are needed! 

We may be walking an unknown path, but we do not walk it alone--praise the Lord! 

*This idea is not originally mine.  I once heard a speaker in
college talk about finding in our lives a Paul, a Barnabas, and a
Timothy.  His idea of types of friends to seek out has never left me.

(Originally posted in 2006.)

our taiwanese wedding banquet

So, right after the ceremony, we headed over to a large Chinese restaurant for the wedding banquet. 

Law's parents picked out the restaurant, but we were pleasantly surprised that they had chosen a restaurant that was own by a Christan.  Very cool!!

Here are some of the banquet highlights:

• Before the whole thing started we (the bridal party) were ushered into a little room for a small rest.  This was very nice.

• We were then introduced and entered the banquet hall.
  

• There were 27 tables at our wedding, which means 270 people.   (Ten people per table is the traditional standard. You tell others how many were at your wedding by telling them how many tables there were.)

• 270 people at a wedding banquet is not considered a large wedding.  Small to medium at best.  I've been to one with 100 tables--that's 1000 people!!

• Also, just FYI, only about 80 people attended both the church ceremony and the wedding banquet.  Many just showed up for the banquet, some were only able to attend the ceremony only, and students were invited to ceremony only.  So, less than a third of the people at the banquet had been at the ceremony.

• After the formal introduction, we sat at the head table at the front with parents, and uncles (and their wives).
  

• After the first dish or so was served, we went "on stage" with his parents
  and my best friend's father, Lin BaBa, who stood in as my "Taiwan
  father." (I love how the two dads seems as if they are standing at attention.)
  

• We toasted everyone (using cranberry juice, interesting to me since in the States we probably would have used grape juice).
  

• Law and I then did the "couple entwined armed" toast together. :)
  
  

• After a few more dishes, we sang a Karaoke song together.  The only love song I know in Chinese is "The Moon Represents My Heart," so that is what we sang! :)
  

• Then he had to "wei wa" wine.  "wei" means to feed someone
  something--kinda like a mother bird feeds her baby chicks (and "wa" means "me").  SO . . . he first had to put the wine into his mouth and then
  "pour" it into mine. All I could think about was "don't you dare get any
  on my dress!" :)
  



• Soon after that the two of us toasted the main family table--parents and uncles.
  

• Next, his parents, Lin Baba (my adopted Taiwanese dad), and Big Uncle joined us as we toasted each table.  Waitresses guided us through the entire room, and followed us making sure we all had full glasses.
  

• There were several other Karaoke songs sung.
  

• Law's parents decided on all the dishes that were served.  There was a lot of seafood.  I ate little, and appreciate the photos people took of the meal since I didn't get to see it all.
  

• When Law's brother and his girlfriend wanted to sing a song, Law "punked" them by making them kiss for a long time.  They "punked" him back by making us show him how . . . so we kissed for 9 seconds--the whole room helped keep count. "9" in Chinese is pronounced "joe" which is the same pronuncation of "long."
  

• After a bit more eating and Karaoke, we stood at the door kinda like a receiving line, passing out candy and photos to our guests.
  

• Some of our good friends stayed a bit longer, and so we took a few more photos together.
  

• Then finally we left . . . .
  

• YAY!!  Weddings OVER!!!! :)