be an advocate for marriage
And to those of you who are happily married, I encourage you to be an advocate for marriage. There are four ways off the top of my head I can think of that would be a great way to be an advocate for marriage.
1. We hear so many people griping and complaining about marriage–the very gift extended singles are longing for. We need to also hear validation from those who’ve already been given the gift of marriage that it is indeed a good gift. Of course, this must be done with care and sensitivity–but I don’t think in all the years I longed to be married that seeing couples in love and enjoying their married life ever hurt, not once. It might have increased the desire, but it always served to push me closer to the cross.
2. In addition, you can explicitly encourage those who aren’t longing for marriage, to consider marriage and maintain hope. I had a very sweet friend who was also an extended single that emailed a year into her new marriage and asked me how I was doing in regards to desire for marriage. At that time my desires for marriage were just beginning to surface, her questions and encouragement had perfect timing. Her love story, her love for her marriage, and hearing her say “you know it’s ok to admit you want to get married” were SUCH a blessing.
3. You can also explicitly encourage those who think they are unsuitable to be married for whatever lame lie(s) they are believing, to consider marriage. Just like Corrina did for Lawrance–he thought marriage was a slight possibility for him but a LONG way down the road. He had no idea what God had in store for him. Even if you don’t have someone in mind for that person, I still think challenging that kind of person to reconsider and encouraging them to consider marriage is a good thing. Lawrance would totally agree. ;)
4. Ask for permission to prayerfully “be on the look out” for your single friends, and then don’t be afraid to prayerfully and wisely offer suggestions for matches. Because we are so thankful for what Corrina did for us, we often ask our single Christian friends if it would be ok if we helped them be on the look out. We’ve even tried to set up double date–with permission from both sides, with all parties knowing what’s going on. We’ve not “made a match” yet, but not once has ANY of our single friends said “no, please don’t help me look.”