One of the things I fought during wedding planning was stress. Meaning I made every effort possible to avoid it. I totally wanted to enjoy the preparation and the day of as much as possible. Of course there were a few intense moments--but let's just chock those up to little sleep and an uncooperative-for-the-moment computer. :)
In fact, for this self-confessed perfectionist, letting go of so much that I would have wanted "perfect" was both a struggle and a blessing. My mom was great in her constant encouragement of "no second guessing" and "no, you are not allowed to rethink that."
Some other things that helped the stress factor was that we planned everything in practically one month. The first month we were engaged I was still in Taiwan . . . I started to look at things online (mostly images of real weddings on flickr and a few blogs about real weddings). And we did decide place and date that first month, but that was about all. Oh, yeah, and I choose the gerber daises--the oh so important gerber daisies which set the mood for everything else I decided! :)
The third month, Lawrance was in America, and I wanted to spend lots of time with him, showing him Texas and introducing him to family. So, of that third month, only the last week was "wedding week." We did do a few other "wedding" stuff his first day in the States--got the marriage license, fitted the boys for tuxes, and picked out our rings. But that was it for the next few weeks.
It was that second month back home that mom and I did most of the planning. So, I count this as a good thing and not as a stressful thing because I couldn't have it in whatever elusive "perfect way" I could envision. I loved that my choices--due to time and money--were limited. Instead of how in the world could I make this as beautiful as possible, I was limited to "here is choice one, two, and three; which one do you like best?" "Two please, but can we do it in pink instead?" "Yes." Ahh . . . so nice.
I also didn't have time "to be married to any idea." There were several times we "cut" stuff simply because to do it in the time we had it would have been stressful . . . and no one but us even knew it was cut.
I wanted our wedding to be simple, joyful, and God-centered. I wanted it to be uniquely us, but still have traditional elements. I wanted it to be worshipful and reverent but at the same time a fun celebration. I know it's a dichotomous combination, but somehow it totally worked and came together beautifully if I do say so myself! :)
And, Lawrance was totally flexible about so much and OH SO VERY supportive. For example . . . one night as I was picking out songs to use for the wedding, he sat across from me folding tissue pompoms (which he is now an official expert at making). I, of course, asked him his opinion, he gave it, and then I totally didn't go with his opinion. I, of course, asked him though "is that ok that we go with the one I want instead?" To which he very kindly replied, "I know what my job is. My job is to fold pompoms, be here for you and support any decision you make. So, yes, that song is great. Good choice, honey." And he meant every word; he wasn't being sarcastic.
day of events and pictures in up coming posts . . . :)